Michael King – Emotional Intelligence Is No Longer a Luxury | Conversations with Coaches | Boxer Media

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Conversations with Coaches | Boxer Media

Michael is the founder and CEO of TEAMS.COACH, LLC and a highly sought-after executive and business leadership coach. He helps business leaders clarify and execute at high levels through his proprietary T.E.A.M.S. Methodology to develop measurable business growth and company-wide collaboration.

In today’s episode, we talk about his early lessons in leadership and organizational principles and the ways in which realizing how broadly applicable those values are lead to him taking his next steps on the road to building his own coaching and leadership development business.

We also touch on the immense importance of emotional intelligence in the workplace, the pitfalls of a certain kind of “humility” (hint: think Imposter Syndrome), and why being approachable is one of his core values as a coach.

Speaking of approachable, Michael was kind enough to offer up his phone number (763-245-4984) for quick questions about coaching, or even for hopping on a Zoom call with him! Just don’t abuse it – no spam texts or weird memes.

To learn more about Michael:


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Kevin Stafford 0:01
Hello, and welcome to another episode of the coffee with Coach’s podcast. I’m your host, Kevin. And today I have with me Michael King. Michael is the founder and CEO of Teams Coach LLC, and a highly sought after executive and business leadership coach, he helps business leaders clarify and execute at the highest levels through his proprietary teams methodology to develop measurable business growth. And company wide collaboration.

Pretty pretty succinctly said, Michael, welcome to the podcast. Thanks for being here.

Michael King 0:30
Hey, thank you so much for having me.

Kevin Stafford 0:33
Let’s go back to the beginning, not Genesis one beginning, let’s go back to let’s go back to the beginning of your your like superhero origin story, as a coach, how did you come to be a coach or maybe realize that you were a coach kind of had those sorts of attributes already, and maybe somebody like mentored you or advise you along those lines? And then how did you go from there to starting your coaching business?

Michael King 0:54
Man, I’m glad that it’s thanks for asking the question. And I’m so glad that you gave the Genesis reference, I feel like that is so appropriate, for what for what I get to talk about. So I actually started off in my leadership, impact career, being a pastor, and started off as a Christian music recording artists, so if which I get to kind of revisit right now just as something as a hobby, which is pretty fun. So, so we have music available out there as well. But um, but yeah, for a couple of decades, you know, I find myself sitting in this number two seat within the within the church serving lead pastors in kind of like in a mega church type environment. But it was, it was, I always found myself sitting sitting in the seat that was the guy that was helping developing the systems and strategies for somebody who had this incredibly compelling vision. And I was kind of the mastermind behind helping making everything work. And in that same space, figuring out how to develop leaders that reflected the culture, the vision and the values of the organizations along the way. And it was going so well, that I started to get reached out by other organizations, in schools and universities and in people do keynote conversations, etc. And somewhere along the way, I decided, You know what, I think that I want to go back and get my Master’s in organizational leadership and just kind of see what this is about, found out about this thing called executive coaching, and I never really looked back, you know, in about 2015, I specifically felt like just this nudge in my gut that maybe my best impact was going to be outside of the local church. And so even though I still, I still have an opportunity, where I keep a very, very limited amount of my bandwidth, dedicated to nonprofit and church leaders, because it’s some of the most difficult places to lead in. So I’m still very committed to helping leaders that, you know, that are transparent and authentic enough to want and deserve help in that space. But now, about 70 to 80%, of what we do is with is with larger enterprise, sea level leaders and their teams and in really locking in ways to execute their vision in ways that they’ve never have before, and get the results that they’ve always wanted in ways that are healthy and, and can be replicated and scalable.

Kevin Stafford 3:12
I really love that, that like the clear commonality there is like organizing people is pretty much the same whatever your endeavors, trying to be organizing, motivating, connecting, collaborating, growing, scaling, a lot of the core principles are the same. And I love that you basically started out there at the foundation where you were like you were doing the foundational work behind the scenes, seeing how everything connects, making things happen, developing leaders, past, present, and future. And you’re just like looking around, and like I know, I know how all of this works. And this applies to just about anywhere despite the almost anywhere I can think of and then I just love that you from that realization, you took that step. And you were like, I can do this in so many other ways I could still serve where my beginning serve where my where my heart was, and still is. And and I but and find so many other ways to serve I just I love I love that journey. That process I just reminds me of how every coach I talked to, it’s their journey is so specific and unique to them. It really is. And yet you can see these common notes, they’re these common notes, these moments of realization, this desire to serve this desire to give back to, to, to take and apply and translate the lessons and principles and frameworks that they’ve come to understand one way or another and then help other people to build them and execute them themselves. It’s like these, these values are core and common. And yet the journey is always so specific and unique. I just I love I love getting to talk about that with people it’s kind of great. So yeah, you’re to the surprise of no one not to this present me You are You are unique and also have a great deal in common with all the other servants and coaches I get to talk to it’s awesome. No question there. I just kind of wanted to complement that.

Michael King 4:50
Oh, man, that’s, that’s super cool. And it’s great to be a part of that. That type of community. You know, one of the things that you kind of when you’re in church leadership. As much as I would love to be able to say like that, you know, everybody’s just this automatically this high level humble leader. There’s also this idea sometimes when you’re in church leadership that you almost have to fake humility sometimes, like, you’re not actually allowed to say, Hey, I actually might be good at this. And so it took me a little bit of time to actually do the mind shift to make a big step out of church ministry, because I knew in my gut that, that there was something bigger that was intended for my life. I knew that I was good at it. But I didn’t know if I was actually giving myself permission to say, Hey, I’m actually really great at this. So let’s kind of see where it goes. And so now, I don’t realize that my story at all, I think before, I used to be kind of like, really tongue in cheek about, yeah, I used to be a pastor. But now I get to work with some of the most amazing, you know, even church leaders, and also some of the best entrepreneur leaders that I’ve ever met in my life. So incredibly grateful for what I get to do.

Kevin Stafford 6:02
I really, really, I really dig the way you framed that distinction between humility and like self deprecation, and sort of like negative self talk, because there’s, there’s a certain kind of humility, that doesn’t allow you to acknowledge what you’re capable of, and what you’re good at. And it’s almost like it’s more of a as opposed to freeing you to pursue the work you want to pursue, it almost traps you in a certain kind of negative feedback loop. And I love that you, you I love the way you framed it in a way you realize that distinction. And you were like, you know, in some ways, this particular form of quote, unquote, humility, sort of like holding me back or inhibiting me in some way and realizing that you could still be a humble servant, and acknowledge the fact that you’re dang good at some things. And it’s important for you to be able to acknowledge that, because that’s how you that’s the first step to really sharing them. It’s so it’s so powerful.

I keep not having follow up questions, I’m just excited to chat about the stuff, which I always bump into this to be this is supposed to be a short podcast, and I’m talking to people who I would love to talk to for hours. And so I’m like, I definitely have to like, squeeze things down as best I can.

Michael King 7:09
We’re all good.

Kevin Stafford 7:10
Good. Let’s move things into, we already kind of have moved things more into the present. Let’s talk about your coaching business today. Who do you coach primarily? And how do you coach them? You know, group coaching, one on one, keynotes, etc? And then do you have a particular area of focus? It’s not I mean, obviously, it sounds like you, your focus is across the board, but primarily in the executive executive suite, so to speak, and their teams?

Michael King 7:34
Yeah, you know, I think the cadence is really important here, in everything, because ideally, at the end of the day, like Whoever tells the best story wins, but who’s who are the ones that tells the best stories, you know, it’s always the organizations and the teams that are operating at the highest levels of, of productivity and creating the great, great stories along the way, the organizations that have great levels of chemistry, high levels of emotional intelligence on the teams, but who’s leading those great teams, it’s always the leaders that have, you know, the, the best, you know, the most compelling vision and the highest levels of authenticity, transparency, high levels of ingenuity and innovation. And so, so my, the name of my company is teams dot coach, because it makes it simple. Because ultimately, I want to be able to get get with your team. But it always starts with the senior leader. And so probably, I’d say probably 70%, or something 70 to 80% of the of, of all the teams that I coach in their higher level enterprise, big business, some some fortune 500 companies, it starts off with me working with a senior leader, whether it’s a vice president or president, CEO level, or the full C suite within the organization. But the cadence goes from a week to week engagement with them to a monthly engagement with C suite and then to a quarterly engagement with with their with the enterprise. And but it always comes down to is the senior leader willing to do the hard work, are they willing to think and to really do some self reflecting and maybe even ask themselves some hard questions about their own personal leadership lid, maybe some fears, insecurities, aspirations, dreams that haven’t been fulfilled yet. And, and also breaking through impostor syndrome, because let that thing that we just talked about fake humility. The number one thing that costs organizations more money than anything, is because a senior leader is dealing with impostor syndrome. And so they try to be something that they’re not, which turns an organization into trying to be something that it’s not so they’re chasing after and they’re trying to replicate things that they were never meant to do in the first place. And, and yeah, I mean, so that’s, that’s what I get to do and I love. I love it because it’s transformational.

I get to see literally the miraculous things happened in front of my life, I see leaders get hope and life and vitality restored back to them. And I see them get wins that they they never thought they were possible before. And so that’s really the point. You know.

Kevin Stafford 10:14
I love that it’s, there’s a word that constantly comes up in these kinds of conversations clarity. That moment where it’s like, there’s a lot of leaders for a lot of different reasons impostor syndrome, but then like, so maybe why do they have impostor syndrome, maybe they’re just not seeing themselves clearly, maybe they’re not seeing their environment clearly, or just how they’re leading clearly, there’s just, it feels like a coach, one of the one of the most powerful things, maybe the most powerful thing that a coach can provide is clarity. And that clarity comes from being able to give a leader provide a leader, an outside perspective, that nevertheless still connects with and cares about them. And I’ve been, I bumped into this sometimes to actually quite often where you think about like a familial relationship, like your family, like hardly anybody ever knows you, as well as your family, or like close friends or people you’ve known for a very long time. However, those kinds of relationships are, they can be very deep intellectually and emotionally. However, those relationships do come with certain kinds of baggage. You know, there’s, there’s certain kinds of influences that come with those long term relationships that are there great. But it also can make it very difficult to see yourself reflected in them very clearly, again, there’s kind of a lack of clarity in certain ways there. And when a coach really, I think, excels at is that ability to come in and build a familial type relationship, at least in regards to how deep it is emotionally and intellectually. And but without any of the baggage that comes from like, you know, you’re married, or, you know, you grew up together, or, you know, this person raised you, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. And then really show you it’s like, okay, we’ve connected, I care about you, you can sense that, you know, that we’ve talked, we’ve we’ve grown, we’ve had our relationship grow. What do you see now, and then all of a sudden, and like you were saying, that moment, when you see the light dawn on their face, you know, where they’re like, they realize something that’s been happening in their lives or something they’ve been doing or not doing for a long, long time. And suddenly, it’s clear right in front of them. And it’s almost that moment of clarity is also a moment of action. Because I feel like once that the moment clarity strikes, it is simultaneous with that first step forward into, I mean, I don’t mean to dramatize it, but a new reality for you, where you’re like free from the burden of especially something like imposter syndrome, which is oh, so frightfully common in a lot of our leaders. So yeah, I once again, I just keep finding myself with no questions just like chatting back and forth. This is my favorite part, this the conversation back and forth. So I just I love I love it. I love the way you identify that that moment of clarity and that building of that clarity as just really like just that moment that just that sparks a leader and really drives you in your coaching practice.

Michael King 12:42
Well, we went down this path a little bit about talking about this, you know, this moment of clarity, imposter syndrome, the why, behind why this stuff even exists in the first place. Everybody has a story. You know, but I have a million stories about about me working through this even as a leader myself, but you know, the things that we the things that we hear, determine the things that we think about, and the things that we think about, determine how we feel, and then the way that we feel determines the decisions and the behaviors that we make in our life. And probably the number one mistake that I made, you’ve heard the saying that says this so that you are the sum average of the five loudest voices in your life. Yes, I’ve made the mistake of actually thinking that I just had to deal with the hand that I was dealt the five loudest voices in my life with me growing up, and even even eventually becoming a pastor stepping into that world. I couldn’t believe how dysfunctional some of those five voices were. And I couldn’t believe like how self serving some of those five wishes were. And as soon as I actually made that shift, understand, wait a minute, if I want to be a better dad, I’m going to put a better dad in my circle. If I want to be a better person and think differently about finances, I’m going to find somebody who’s a rockstar with finances. But understanding that when when it comes to getting clarity, and to be able to see things that you’ve never seen before, if there’s one thing I can tell other coaches to make sure that they don’t miss out on is the ability to help your clients see something that they’ve never seen before and explore something different and better in life giving and free. And in that moment, what you just said that that aha moment, that moment when that clarity comes on. Yeah, I have literally sat in front. In fact, even earlier today, I had a session with one of my, with one of my clients, and I recognize six months into this, she’s a completely different person than who she was six months ago. And, and it was it was it was a pretty awesome, powerful moment.

Kevin Stafford 14:35
It really is great what we get to be a part of, isn’t it? It’s just it’s almost, I mean, you think about it, and it’s just it’s such a again, I don’t mean I don’t mean to use an overly dramatic word, but it really is a blessing in the sense that it’s a service that you’re able to provide that also it has these radiating benefits sort of like how you were talking about how you start with your with your executive, you start with your team leader, your president, vice president, whatever it happens to be, because the way that that works is that that whatever works you do with that leader naturally radiates out into their team, into their family into the other people they have in their life. And so it’s really that way for your your coaching to have this almost exponentially magnified power. And yeah, it’s just to be able to be present before it is it really is a blessing. It really is magical. I keep coming back to these words that sound fantastical. But that really is the way it is, as keep wanting to drive that home to the audio like yeah, it does feel like this.

Michael King 15:28
Well, in out of all the words that you said, I love the fact that you dropped the word fantastical at the very end there. I was like, I’m like I’m in like, this is good. No, I think it’s great. And we have to remind ourselves to as leaders too. And there’s multiple different ways that I think about this with with the people that I get to serve, but whatever we make visible are the things that we eventually attract. And so as a leader and as a senior leader, as a human being we you have to, we have to recognize the things that we choose to elevate, and the things that we choose to project out of our lives. Somehow we’re in this like, this universal game of ping pong, and we’re always going to be matched up with the things that we that we project. So that was a brilliant analogy wasn’t so good, right? Yeah, I love the fantastical universal game of ping pong.

Kevin Stafford 16:19
I still got my ping pong paddle stored away somewhere back from back from I guess what I might call my good old days, I guess when I used to play a lot more ping pong and I do

Michael King 16:28
We got a ping pong table in the basement. My daughter’s in varsity tennis so she can now school me hardcore.

Kevin Stafford 16:39
Nothing like being exceeded by the by the next generation. It’s a little bittersweet, but mostly sweet.

Michael King 16:47
It’s most it is most of the sweet. You kind of know you’ve arrived when that moment not really necessarily arrived. But you feel like you might have done at least one thing right in your life.

Kevin Stafford 16:56
Speaking of I guess, the next generation will segue into what’s coming next for you and your coaching and your coaching business. I mean, it’s a we’re already, almost when we’re recording this, we’re almost done with April. So this year is flying by, but what’s coming up in the rest of 2022 for you that you’re excited about or want to talk about?

Michael King 17:17
Well, you know, I’m excited to because as my as my coach is my clients are, are transforming and evolving, you know, so, so am I, you know, this is this is something where, where, as a leader, I have to consistently consistent grow. And I always tell other coaches this too, but never trust an executive coach who doesn’t have an executive coach and so. So just this past couple months, I’ve brought on another executive coach for myself, to take me to the next level. And he’s actually, he’s somebody that I’ve dreamed of working with for a while. And so I’m very excited to work with him. I just signed with a new with a new agency that’s handling all of my speaking engagements. And so I’m thankful that COVID is done. And that I get to go out and I’ve, you know, I’ve narrowed down my five topics of, you know, the major things that we feel like for 2022 and 2023 that every single leader and organization needs to hear, that are the kind of the life or death moments right now. So I’m excited about that these podcasts tours have been a blast for me. But even more importantly, I think is that finding that finding that sweet spot of being able to clearly identify who our ideal clients are, and to serve them in a way that’s comprehensive, and breathtaking and meaningful. So those are kind of the things I you know, like, so this year, I’ve brought on, you know, we I have media staff, I have marketing staff now, and I have two other associate coaches who are helping spread out my bandwidth a little bit, a little bit better. So. So overall, I feel like and then, and then the innovation that’s happening within our teams dot coach app, so we can have better smaller rhythms of accessibility that are more meaningful. So, you know, I think there’s, there’s a lot there. But at the end of the day, like I’m getting better at this, my team is getting there, our rock stars are so good. And, and there’s so many compelling stories to tell. And I think that where things are going, this is a fun time to be in business and in leadership, by the way, because all the rules changed over the last few years. And so you and I are in spaces where we get to we get to actually determine what the new rules are. And that is that’s a that’s powerful, and that’s meaningful.

Kevin Stafford 19:33
It’s almost it’s almost a little bit heavy. I get I get it almost every day it occurs to me how how grateful I am and excited to be in this space right now. It is just because yeah, it’s honestly your the way you describe your business right now is the way I think of the whole industry. There’s just this rising tide, where there’s just it’s not just like one thing or two things that are advancing or moving forward. There’s just this whole this whole element, this whole area that’s just just growing and scaling at a rate that’s just it’s really exciting to be a part of it? I guess that’s, that’s yeah, it’s just I’m, I’m stoked every day.

Michael King 20:07
Yeah, like what, you know, a real quick example of that. And I know this is supposed to be short form, but we’ll close it out with the. But for example, you know, we’ve been, we’ve been talking about emotional intelligence being one of the most important things that organizations can really be talking through probably for the next decade or so. Well, we’ve already been talking about this before 2018, and 2019. And we’ve been working with teams to making sure that we actually put into their into their weekly development matrix ways to actually measure culture into actually intentionally developing emotional intelligence within their organizations, because we found that these are the things that give us the best KPIs, and the in the best ROI, the best return. And so now it’s 2022. And guess what it is, it’s no longer optional for you to not be an emotionally intelligent organization. Yep. And, and so we, so myself and my team, if I’m, it feels like we’re fitting into the shoes that have been prepared for us. And this is exciting because we have been in this space, we’ve been speaking on this for quite a while. And in the leaders that we’re connecting with now, I feel like we’ve we’ve we’ve kind of been built to help people prepare for these moments that we’re in right now. And it’s been just absolutely fun and exciting and meaningful to be a part of it.

Kevin Stafford 21:24
Love that. I think I think I might make that the title of this episode. Emotional Intelligence is no longer an option. Or something to that effect. I’ll I’ll workshop

Michael King 21:31
Absolutely. Do it. Run with it.

Kevin Stafford 21:35
Not a luxury, it’s a necessity. Agreed, where we’re can people we talked a little bit before I hit record about how how important it is to be active on social media and just kind of available and out there and how much work it is. But that said, where do you like for people to find you find out more about you and also connect with you and just kind of start building a relationship? Do you have a preferred social media platform that you find to be the least toxic or time consuming? And also, let’s talk about your website and where people can just learn more?

Michael King 22:07
Yeah, well, my website is the same as my name is same as my my company name. So just teams dot coach. And everything about us gets wrapped up in that word teams, by the way, that’s our coaching methodology as far as how we coach leaders on a week to week basis, as well. So there’s more information on how we do that, and why our team’s methodology actually helps you get to sustainable and functional results incredibly fast. So there’s that but but follow up, follow me on Facebook and Instagram, follow me even on Twitter, the content, you’re not going to be pulled into some sort of weird click funnel vortex by becoming a friend of mine or reaching out to me. In fact, I always give out my cell phone number at the very end of these things. Because my team and I we have literally just gotten to the space of where we want to be approachable. But you’re what you’re going to do by following us on social is you’re going to consistently see professionally produced content in which we’re just helping serve the leadership space wherever people are at. And we found literally that you know, like, just like I told you before, whatever you make visible is what you replicate. We find ourselves just through our partnerships with different media, like here, here, I don’t know where you’re located at but I’m I’m in the Omaha area of in Lincoln area. So we have Okay, fantastic. So we have partnerships with the likes of Lincoln Journal Star and in the Omaha World Herald in that group of folks that do some great job of just reading content that we put out on a month to month basis as well. So anyway, just lock in Facebook, you know, teams that coach Michael King, Instagram teams that coaches Well, Twitter, Michael King, Jr. And, man just and then feel free to reach out or just send me a number is that okay? If I give myself a number real quick, and then you can do whatever you want with that.

Kevin Stafford 23:51
If you want this on the episode will broadcast it to the, to the world to the hundreds that listen.

Michael King 23:56
Yeah, well, it’s, I’ll tell you why I do this in a minute. But my number is 763-245-4984. And feel free to put that in your show liner notes. And people can text me any question that they have just a quick question on leadership, or they want to hop on a zoom call with me. But we just we decided a long time ago that we wanted to be the approachable coaches, you know, and not everything’s a sales transaction. And so we lead from a place of being not transactional in our relationship and endeavors but true relationship in transformational experiences. So we do whatever we can to just try to be as approachable as we can. And to serve people where they’re at.

Kevin Stafford 24:35
I think we could enclose on a better note, Michael, thank you so much for for the time we’ve spent and a little bit of extra time. I know I I know, I try I promised that I would try to keep it to 15 minutes, but this was just too good of a conversation. So thank you for showing up. Thank you for staying and thank you for going a little bit long with me today.

Michael King 24:54
I appreciate it, man. You’re You’re great man. Let’s connect again. And I’d love to love to be able to continue to spar with you but And this This is really good.

Kevin Stafford 25:01
Yeah, this is fun. I mean, at the end of note to too long podcast is always a part two. It’s what I hear.

Michael King 25:07
Alright, let’s do it, brother. I’m all game.

Kevin Stafford 25:09
All right, Michael. Thank you, audience. Thank you so much for listening. Find Michael reach out, call him text him. Anything you want. As you could tell, he’s great to talk to and we will talk to you again very soon.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

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